An Open Letter to Fear: You’re Not Welcome Here—Somewhat
Salutations fear,
In full transparency, I debated over writing to you, mainly because you’ve caused me to be apprehensive about sharing my voice over the past few months. To be honest, I’ve been struggling with your presence for quite some time. I recall being aware of your existence as far as my memories go back. I remember being afraid of the dark and the monsters I believed were under my bed and in the closet. But it wasn’t until I was much older that the feelings of agitation, angst, anxiety, panic, and terror showed up in my life in what seemed like full blast. What I considered to be the “Boogeyman” as a child switched to feelings of inadequacy and failure.
During my adolescent years you hindered me from being myself out of fear of non-acceptance. You also occupied my mind with thoughts of unavoidable doom in my marriage. You popped up with worries of losing my parents and you even reared your ugly head among my aspirations. Recently, I allowed you to influence my behavior and thoughts related to the new administration in the United States and work problems I caused. Those thoughts created broken sleep, eye twitches, and stress-related digestion issues. Because of this, you are not welcome here—somewhat.
I acknowledge your tactics birthed unpleasantries and doubt, but they have also been for my good despite your plan for my demise. I realize you may be confused by my message to you—so, I’ll make it plain. Although you’ve caused some moments of despair and worry, I was reminded of who my source of help is. I remembered experiencing peace that surpassed my understanding while I endured losing my first son. I also recollected receiving grace when my doctor told me my second son and I were both going to die. For a moment, I lost sight on the fact that the same God who kept me in those situations is able to keep me in whatever I face today and tomorrow. So, I’m choosing not to view you as my downfall, but rather a vehicle to cast my concerns on the one who cares for me. I know you will try your best to return to my mind, and that’s fine because I’m equipped with a sword to counter your attack:
“These things have I spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” - St. John 16:33 KJV
Additionally…
“Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. - Isaiah 41:10 KJV
Furthermore…
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” - 2 Timothy 1:7 KJV
“Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen. -Ephesians 3:20-21 KJV
- T.V.
